Note cards for extended family not expected to attend service
It’s great that your mom is making plans for her service – that is very thoughtful and wise of her to do that.
To answer your question, I have to ask a question – at the time of her death, will there be any obituary or notice posted on the internet by anyone? (funeral home website, newspaper, Facebook, etc.) If so, I think there’s a good chance the nieces and nephews will learn about it. This would give them the chance to attend the service which is perfectly okay – as it sounds like your mother just didn’t want them to feel obligated.
Either way – I think you would be fine to send out prayer cards after the service to any extended family who did not attend her service.
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