The Most Important Thing We Can Learn From Joan Rivers

9/4/14 UPDATE:

We are sad to report that Joan River’s daughter, Melissa, has announced that her mother, died today at the age of 81.

“It is with great sadness that I announce the death of my mother, Joan Rivers,” Melissa Rivers said in a written statement today. “She passed peacefully at 1:17 p.m. surrounded by family and close friends. My son and I would like to thank the doctors, nurses, and staff of Mount Sinai Hospital for the amazing care they provided for my mother.”

Melissa Rivers added that she and her son, Cooper, who is Joan Rivers’ grandson, “have found ourselves humbled by the outpouring of love, support and prayers we have received from around the world. They have been heard and appreciated. My mother’s greatest joy in life was to make people laugh. Although that is difficult to do right now, I know her final wish would be that we return to laughing soon.”

Read the full story: ABC News Reports Joan Rivers Death

 

Original Post on 9/3/14:
It’s been almost a week since we received word that Joan Rivers suffered from cardiac arrest while undergoing simple throat surgery. Just yesterday her daughter, Melissa, confirmed that Joan is now on life support at Mount Sinai Hospital in New York City. Today we learned that Joan has been moved out of ICU into a private room.

“On behalf of my mother and our family, we are extremely grateful for all the love and support we have received,” Melissa Rivers said.
“At this time, she does remain on life support.
“I know my mother would be overwhelmed by the continued outpouring of kindness and I want to thank everyone for keeping us in their prayers.”

Since the news of Rivers’ medical emergency broke, we have been reminded of what a remarkable woman she is. If you were lucky enough to grow up in the days when Joan was at her best as a comedian, you know just how funny she can be. We have watched as she moved from the master of stand-up and late-night diva to daytime talk show host and jewelry hawkster and finally to fashion critic and reality TV star. Her career shows amazing depth and breadth, and at 81, she is arguably as popular as ever.

Looking back on Joan Rivers’ journey to success, we realize that there are many important things we can learn from her.

• How to be different. When Joan came on the comedy scene, her brash and provocative style had never been seen by a woman.
• How to overcome career challenges. She overcame being blackballed in the industry by the great Johnny Carson to reestablish herself as a talk show host and coveted late-night guest.
• How to overcome personal tragedy. Joan’s husband, Edgar Rosenberg, committed suicide in 1987.
• How to be honest. Joan has always been notorious for saying what is on her mind. She has openly discussed her plastic surgery and never hesitates to provide commentary on whatever is in the news, regardless of how popular her opinion might be.
• How to reinvent yourself. When her career was slumping, she moved to New York and started all over again. She again transformed herself to become the popular host of The Fashion Police when the appeal of her particular brand of humor began to fade.

These five lessons can teach us a great deal about never giving up despite what seems to be insurmountable odds and how to stay true to yourself. But as important as these lessons are, there is another thing that we can learn from Joan’s current situation that is perhaps the most important lesson of all:

Do what you need to do to make sure your family knows your wishes in the time of a medical emergency.

Unless you have been in a similar situation, it is impossible to understand how difficult the decision to put her mother on life support must have been for Melissa Rivers. Since the action took place quickly, we can only assume that Joan had the necessary paperwork in place to allow her family and her medical professionals to take the actions that she wanted. Imagining the scenario that would take place if this was not the case is not pleasant. If you have not left behind clear instructions and legal authorization, your family may not even have the authority to make that decision. This is not the position you want to leave your loved ones in.

Should you become incapacitated and are unable to speak or communicate, the only way your family will know what steps to take is if you have put your wishes in writing. To do so is a simple process that involves completing advance directives.

Read more about Advanced Directives on Funeralwise.com

There are three types of advance directives, and it is recommended that you complete all three.

• Living Will – instructions for your preferred level of treatment (for example, whether to have a feeding tube or other forms of life support.)
• Durable power of attorney for health care – designation of another person to make medical decisions for you if you can’t make them for yourself.
• Do not resuscitate (DNR) order – whether you want to be resuscitated if your heart or breathing stops.

While these are legal documents, you do not need a lawyer’s assistance to draw them up. There are dozens of samples online. In many cases, all you need to do is print them and sign them in front of a notary. They do vary by state, so you need to be sure that you download the correct version. You can find links to state forms for on the advance directives page of the Funeralwise.com website.

We hope that today’s news of Joan being moved out of ICU is the first of many of positive announcements about her condition. We, like the rest of the world, send our thoughts and prayers out to Joan and her family. For now, we will just once again repeat our advice that you make sure you have the correct documents in place to ensure that your loved ones can fulfill your wishes if medically necessary.

For now, we’ll leave off with a Joan Rivers quote that we think provides a great representation of her spirit. Keeping her sentiment in mind, we look forward to seeing what terrific things come out of this particular dark moment for her.

I have become my own version of an optimist. If I can’t make it through one door, I’ll go through another door — or I’ll make a door. Something terrific will come no matter how dark the present.”
― Joan Rivers